I've not been keeping up to date on John Waffles Kerry lately, and for that I appologize. I have been working on an update chronicling his various waffling and shifting messages about the economy, which, btw, is still booming, and I hope to finish the research for it in the next day or so.

In the mean time, I wanted to mention that Pretty Boy John Edwards, the only Democrat with a somewhat sunny disposition throughout the Democratic Primaries, seems to be trying to get in the Waffler's good graces through an e-mail campaign to get Dems to support Kerry... so I thought I'd have a little fun with it.

Dear Friend,

You and I together can change this country by helping John Kerry win back the White House. If we want to build an America where equal opportunity and the chance to build something for your family are a priority of our government and reality in our lives, then we need to reach deep down and work non-stop to support John Kerry.

Yes, you can change this country by voting Kerry into office... it would look something like this:

Every four years, Americans are blessed with the chance to make this country stronger. We get the chance to look at our President in Washington and ask, "Is that guy really working for us? Is he really thinking about creating better jobs here in America? Does he understand how expensive health care is for middle class families? What's his plan to make us energy independent from Middle East oil? And will he make America more respected in the world?"

Is Bush working for us? Two words: Tax Cuts... or two more words: Education Reform... or two more words: Homeland Security. Yeah, I think it would be fair to say he is working for us.

As for Jobs... 1.4 million jobs have been created in the past nine months, and I think it is appropriate to say, as American Icon Ronald Reagan is remembered as saying, "All in all, not bad, not bad at all."

A good question for Edwards would be, "Can Kerry even relate to middle class families?" This son of fortune was well to do and then married money... billionaire money!"

Bush has increased funding for alternate fuel research, like Hydrogen powered automobiles, and his efforts to allow drilling in Barren Alaskan Wastelands was halted by environmentalist whackos on the left... a better question is how is Kerry gonna completely liberate the American Economy from foreign-fuel dependence? What difference does it make if France doesn't like Bush's policies? The UN voted unanimously to support the hand over of sovereignty to the new Iraqi Government...

You and I know that when it comes to George W. Bush, the answer to each one of those questions is "no," but we know that with John Kerry the answer to these questions will be "yes."

Johnny Boy... do Democrats really need you to think for them?

During the campaign, I got to know John Kerry very well, and I saw up-close what he's made of.

I imagine it looked like this:

He showed in this campaign exactly what he's shown in his entire life - courage and strength. He served our country in Vietnam, and he put his life on the line to defend our freedoms. It took great character and resolve. When you listen to the men who served with him in Vietnam, they tell you how much they respect him and that they know that he is a natural leader. This is the same kind of leadership he brought to the United States Senate.

John Kerry Served in Vietnam? I'd never heard that... Oh yeah, that's where he earned all of those ribbons... I mean medals... medals ribbons, they are interchangeable, you know. You know, I distinctly remember Kerry saying something about his time in Vietnam.

John Kerry will fight for the things that all of us believe in: more jobs, better health care, cleaner air, cleaner water, a safer world. These are the causes of our party, and the causes of this country. And they are the reasons why John Kerry will prevail in November.

It is time to change this country - a country that you and I love. With so much at stake in this election, I am asking every single one of my friends to do everything you can to help elect John Kerry.

Any amount you are able to contribute will make a real difference. Please visit John Kerry's website, and contribute today!

I had a little fun with that link

Your friend,

John Edwards